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It's time to once again cleanse the mind. Here we go.
1. I'm an aggressive driver. Anyone who knows me knows that. I'm trying to work on it but stupid people really annoy me.
2. Old bag in the silver Impala: I'm sorry that I tailgated you, for about 8 miles. You asked for it tho. Doing 25 in a 35 and then 40 in a 50 just begs for it. I apologize but I don't care.
3. Fat-Boy parking his boat: Yeah, I saw the reverse lights. But I figured I was doing YOU a favor by taking the closest parking spot. You need the exercise anyways.
4. Joe: I'm tired of you blowing up my cell. If I wanted to come "hang" with you then I would have done it already. Take a hint. 22 messages in a day is excessive.
5. Heather: Nobody really cares about your stupid tattoo. Oh wow, now you're one of the millions who has one. You're just SO original!
6. I may or may not have been the one who triped walking up the stairs and spilled my capuccino. As you can see, no, I didn't clean it up. Sue me.
7. I know I said I was going to meet with you at 5:00 but changed it to 9:00. I'm sorry that I have a life and you do not.
8. I gave in to the bugger that was plaguing my nose and commenced to wiping it on the underside of the chair I was sitting in. Like anyone would find it there anyway.
9. I lied, I really don't care about how big your kid has gotten. She's always been a whiney little brat, always will be. It's nothing to showcase!
10. Kitty-Cat: You appear annoyed with my inability to silence my farts. I own you. Let's not forget that.
Ah, the sense of redemption. Ain't it grand?!
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